The Garden is a Mess

For the first time in a while, I stepped off the path, over to the tomatoes, and discovered a jungle mess that had been out of sight.  The furrows we worked on so hard last spring have worn down or are completely hidden by the overgrowth.  We were so good at weeding until it got hot.  Those little weeds have grown into huge spindly monsters.  I pulled the ones that came out easily, but then I just gave up.  I'll till them in later.

How much it is like my life.  Just a mess.  My brokenness overgrown and big.  Some sins easy to pull out, but others so entrenched that I just leave them alone.  Many gain strength simply from lack of attention.

As I walked through looking for tomatoes, I couldn't even tell where the rows were.  Those pitiful little tomato plants I put out last June have spilled out everywhere.  Some never got a cage around them and have sprawled out five or six feet.  Others got cages, but grew out more than up.  Others grew up and knocked their cage over.

Looking at that knocked over cage was like taking an honest look at my life.  My own need for control overgrowing and knocking over others with unrelenting pressure.  My self-centeredness searching for a place of importance, but with no support, flopping over in a heap on the ground.

Christina came to say hi while I was walking around.  I don't see her much any more.  I'm too lazy to go say "hi" just for fun, and with no milking to be done there isn't much reason to go out there.  I admit that fear is part of my problem.  She is a large animal and can be pushy.  I don't know how to respond to that, so I stay away.  But she hasn't forgotten me.  She gently walked over, sniffed me, and watched my excursion.  I get lazy and scared of God too.

Some weeds are going to seed.  I can hear my father-in-law, dead almost eight years now, saying, "better get those pulled."  But there are so many of them.  The ground is hard.  The roots are stubborn.  So I walk away, let them spread their seed, providing certainty that they will be back next year.

Weeds discourage me, the same as sin does.  I walk through these uninvited plants and feel overwhelmed.  I wonder if this is how God feels walking through my life, discouraged at the sins grown large from lack of attention and lack of will.

But as I walk I notice other things too.  The broccoli plant I hadn't gotten around to pulling had a new crop of blooms on the back side, down under the dominant topgrowth.  They are perfect flowerettes, dark and dense, better looking than anything we got last spring.  Could there be parts of me flowering on the back side, places where God has been quietly growing something better than I've ever seen?

The cantaloupe plant is dying back, and plump orange cantaloupes are standing up out of the declining vines.  They sweeten as the plant recedes.  I hear an echo of the cross, a dying body, that left such sweet fruit for all humanity.  Are there parts of my life that are like the dying vines, leaving sweet fruit behind?

I looked under a large squash canopy and found perfect fruits in their final preparation for winter.  I didn't even know they were there.  There were lots of them, round, beautiful, and hardening for a long cold wait until they warm and nourish our family.  I have ignored these plants just like I ignored the weeds, but they have produced.

The weeds have grown, but the garden has grown stronger.  The weeds may be big, but God didn't let that stop abundant growth.  In fact, as I look back over the garden, most of it looks as if the weeds didn't make any different at all.  It just looks neater to me without weeds. But God doesn't need the weeds to stay away to make amazing things happen.  My attention or lack of attention doesn't seem to make a big difference either because with God there is new life.  With God there is fruit.  With God there is a harvest.  My job is only to look for it.